Saturday 28 February 2015

Food for thought: No this post isn't white and bloody gold!

cool and stupid are closer than you think...



The white and gold dress debate that is currently raging through the internet (Faith, humanity, yada yada yada *ed) is not actually a new and amazing topic of discussion. It's just a bit (alot *ed) silly and the next "big thing" people in scool yards/back gardens/office canteens can discuss and debate about. And to be honest, I am probably 12 hours too late writing this blog as many of you that frequent the internet may already be saying "what the %*&^ are you talking about?!". Such is the nature of these "flash in a pan" viral products. So allow me to back up a touch...

On Thursday a picture became viral on the internet. This picture depicted a simple white and gold dress. Within hours the internet was full of images,memes, and pictures regarding the dress It even appeared on news reports as people debated whether the dress was white and gold or a different combination of colours. Because apparently some people saw black and gold, or blue and gold, or blue and yellow. The picture was a simple trick that sparked a torrent of theories and explanations as to why people saw different colours.


So there you have it. Cool? I don't think so. I think it is a sad day when the world is discussing the colour of a dress. But then again. I am one who guffaws in delight every time I see a Chuck Norris meme. 
  That has me thinking: What is the difference between something that is truly witty and clever, or something that is clever enough to create a worldwide debate?

I believe its a thin line between the two. Either way the creators of this viral phenomena need to be acknowledged as smart(ass *ed) individuals. Its a stange thing when you think about it as gaining notoriety and being ignored can be an incredibley slim version of the oforementioned thin line.
For example, a Youtube video that went viral a while back entitled "Angry german kid" depicted a young german teenager trashing his computer in frustration while playing a videogame. Around the same time (perhaps even before) this video was released I personally saw a few other similar videos depicting children/teenagers/adults getting frustrated on a video game and doing damage to either the console,the T.V or in one hilarious video, themselves ( I believe its called " T.V drops on stupid kids foot" or something like that) and yet with a fraction of viewers as the "Angry German kid" video. Why is this? What is so special about the German kid video that garnered all the attention? 

The same can be said I suppose of many things within pop culture and the media. After all one persons Ying can be another's Yang. And as said before there must be a certain amount of strategy and timing in ensuring the product attracts the public eye.
   I enjoy watching the occassional Lets play video (person playing a video game and commentating whilst playing *ed) yet I prefer RadBrad over the hugely popular Pewdiepie. Is RadBrad "better" than Pewdiepie? Thats up for eternal debate and mostly down to preference, as most things in life should be. As long as people understand there is a brilliant and beautiful world away from the internet I see no harm in viral products.
  Just please dont let me see that stupid dress again...

Friday 27 February 2015

Pop Culture News

Star Trek legend Leanard Nimoy dies aged 83


It is a sad day when one of your heroes dies. That unfortunately is the case as actor Leanard Nimoy AKA Star Trek's Spock died in Los Angeles this morning.

Leanard Nimoy, popularly known as the half human half vulcan in Star Trek was an extraordinary man who,along with his Star Trek cohorts put Sci-fi on the map. Before Star Trek if you wanted anything remotely serious or thought provoking it would be a trip to the local library. Something which didn't do the geeks and the nerds any favours back in the day. However Leanard Nimoy's portrayal of spock really brought Sci-fi to the attention of million's. I remember as a child watching the then brand new Star Trek: The Next Generation T.V series and wondering why Spock was a robot and why Kirk was bald. Hey, I was young.

The legend unfortunately revealed he had contracted chronic lung disease last year and earlier this morning, after being in hospital for a week lost the battle. Whilst in hospital he left his final tweet, which was of course as poetic and deep as he was. It read "A life is a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory.  LLAP". The final letters refering to his legendary Spock quote "Live long and prosper".

A little known fact is Spock's hand gesture (The index and middle finger speading out to make a V sign) was heavily influenced by a Jewish parade he witnessed as a child. He was told by his father to put his hands over his face as he was walking through a crowd of Jewish men performing a ritual. Young Leanard of course took a peek from behind his hands and witnessed the men performing the hand gesture we know and love. It's actually a religious shape,representing the letter "shin".
   Needless to say the memory stuck with Leanard Nimoy and before performing a scene in Star Trek where the viewers would first see Vulcan, Leanard suggested the gesture as a "hand shake" the Vulcans would do to greet each other. Hence a legend was born and almost fifty years later people still enjoy the Sci-Fi show. Few would argue this has alot to do with Leanard Nimoy and his iconic role

The man certainly did live long and prospered and this particular fan has a heavy heart due to the death of such a marvelous and iconic man.

Thursday 26 February 2015

Review: The Order 1886

Excuse me waiter, there's a penis in my video game.



Games have grown up. True, the industry has been saying this for years but I think only over the last year or two this has really been the case. With adult and intense stories like The Last Of Us and The Walking Dead video game pathing the way for how a game can be more than a nerdy passtime. Gone (almost *ed) are the days of dev's thinking a bit of boob and more F bomb's than a Roy Chubby Brown tribute act convention are whats needed to make a game grown up. The Order 1886 follows in the ironic trend of a game trying to be more than one. And to this gamer, my word does it work.
   The problem however is not that games have grown up-they have- but that gamers havn't. I will try my best to focus on the qualities and fault's of The Order 1886 throughout this review but it must be brought to peoples attention how hypocritical the gaming industry can be.
   When the PS3 was in its infancy it had a library of, shall we say underwhelming games. Games like Resistance: Fall of man, Genji: Days of the Blade and the standard of average EA sports titles meant fan's were desperate for the first Killer app of the 7'th gen. They got it with Uncharted. Uncharted was (and still is) a cinematic mish mash of story and game and it worked. It worked so much that Nathan Drake became a mascot of playstation and starred in three more games,with another Uncharted to come to PS4 this year. But back to the first game (and my point! *ed), the first Uncharted was a single player experience with around seven hours on the clock once the game was beat. It got 8's and 9's and as stated above was praised as a masterpeice. The Order 1886 is a single player experience with around seven hours on the clock once the game is beat. The marks it has recieved from critics? 5's and 6;s Its this hypocrisy in the gaming industry that this particular gamer feels will be the death of our beloved hobby.

For Queen and Country, guv'nor.



   Anyway,rant over, in terms of the game itself. It has a fantastic blend of cinema and cover based third person shootery that really pulls you into the steampunk universe. The game takes place in (you guessed it) 1886 at the peak of the industrial revolution. The queen vic is in power (the person not the pub *ed), London is full of fog, Jack the ripper is on the loose and Werewolfs run rampant.
   Yes this is an "alternate" London with the aforemention Lycans causing a problem for our games protagonist's, a bunch of Knights no less. This review will contain no spoilers of any sort because part of the apeal of this game is to draw you into its mystery and intrigue. Needless to say there are twists and turns a plenty and this particular gamer didnt see many of them coming.
   As for the gameplay itself. The shooting is tight and the weapons feel sufficiently powerful. The Thermite rifle being a favorite involving covering an area with thermite gas then igniting the gas with a flare. There are area's where you are doing nothing but walking through the foggy suburbs of Whitechapel and even stealth sections. All these don't impose too much on the staple gameplay of area to area exploration and shooting. The game does nothing you havn't seen countless times over the last few years however what it does, it does very very well. And again with such an atmosperic setting and story it hooks you like its the first time you have seen such mechanics in a game.

Bit short innit? Thats what she said. Arf arf.



Of course a review of such a big release like The Order 1886 would'nt be complete without regarding the elephant in the room. Its length. Well let me ask you, what would you prefer? A game with fetch quests, side activities  and many hours of exploring the same area before progressing the story? Or a game that is no longer than it needs to be to ensure the narrative is tight,well paced and immersive? If your ideal game is the former,this may not be for you and you may find more enjoyment in games like Destiny or Dying light. If however you love a good story then look no further. The Order 1886 is a great one.

How much I'd spend on this game.


   So in summary, I love The Order 1886. It has just what I want from a narrative driven game. A great narrative. The length dosn't come into it. After all, did you hear people complaining that Bambi was only an hour long? Of course not. It's a great film and adding any more to it would just detract from the overall experience.
   Oh and yes. There is a penis in this game.

I would pay £40 for The Order 1886.

Blog list: Things my four year old says and their translations

My four year old son is so grown up. He tries to always get in the conversation whether he knows what the conversation is about or not. However, he IS four and some words or phrases he still dosn't quite have the hang of. I thought it would be fun to share them...

Translation's at the bottom for all those trying to guess :)

1: Dumptruck and wiimote
2: Mario Kitten
3: Kindle-egg
4: Purple Juice
5: White sauce
6: Tartar sauce
7: Angry Tekken
8: Teenage Hurdles
9: Eggscusting
10: PsPeter
11: Welcome to the future!(Got to sing it)
12: Captain Mario
13: Dr Falcon
14: Minibuttons
15: Candle Kong

Bless him I do love the little tyke. He does try...
Now the translations:

1: Nunchuck and Wiimote
2: Mario 3D World
3: Kinderegg
4: Blackurant/ Ribena
5: Mayonaise
6: Tomoto sauce
7: Street fighter X Tekken (When he asked what game i was playing i pronounced it Street Fighter cross Tekken)
8: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
9: Discusting
1o: Ps Vita
11: Trials: Evolution (He can only sing the title theme bless him)
12: Dr Mario
13: Captain Falcon
14: Minions (Dispicable Me)
15: Cranky Kong


So there you have it. He isnt perfect but he's only four and i wouldnt change him for all the money in the world. After all, it does make for some hilarious situation's!

Please blurt out a verbal notion or butt bounce that like button. Or do both, I promise the space time continuum will not explode...probably...

Upcoming content: Review's

 In this modern world we occupy many thing's are within arm's reach. Mobile phone's with multiple features that go way beyond the obligatory answering and making call's. T.V's that are no longer constrained by schedule or region (Thank you Netflix/Amazon/Now etc) and people who like nothing more than gush praise or rain wrath upon a piece of entertainment.
   The latter is what I am going to be throwing my "tupence" at in future blog's. Of course this being my blog and this being me with no journalistic expertise what so ever I thought I would use this prelimenary post to establish a few ground rules.
   Firstly and most important. These reviews will be solely MY opinion. Yes I know that statement has been thrown around more than Jeremy Kyle has had facebook condemmed on his shows but i mean it. Will you agree with my opinion's and rating's? Perhaps. Will I force my opinion upon you like its gospel? Of course not. After all its your opinion.
   Secondly my rating. Ratings are, in my opinion (see how this works? *ed) not needed as they are right now. And I believe that there are only two reasons as to why anyone would buy a product. Whether you enjoy that sort of thing in the first place (e.g. You are into the "genre" of the film/game etc) and how much the product is. Whilst I could never influence either I can share my opinion as to whether it is "worth" the price of admission. So for future post's concerning a review, rather than having a score at the end like most journalistic publications have. I will share mt thoughts on how much i would be willing to spend on the product. This way, you can decide if my pricepoint means the product is "worth" it to you. Simple eh?
   Reviews for a few things i have watched and played recently will be coming to this blog very very soon so feel free to leave a comment on what you think of my scoring mechanism or by all means piledriver that like button like the Zangief Zealots you know you are...Thank you

Wednesday 25 February 2015

Short Blog

Sorry for not updating daily folks. Had a highly dangerous and life threatening illness. It's an illness many males can unfortunately get and is a widely underestimated and even in some cases contagious illness that simply demands more recogition.
   So I'm dedicating my mini blog today to raising awareness. If you have a husband, partner, brother, father, uncle, grandfather or god forbid a son who has or is suffering from man-flu please show the illness the respect and attention it deserves.
(Donationstowardsmanfluaregreatlyappreciatedandwelcomedpleasedonthesitatetodosobylikingmypageasthelikebuttonhasastrangelyhealingeffect)
Thank you

Sunday 22 February 2015

Food For Thought: Am I Too Old To Be A Gamer?

In this first post of the "Food For Thought" series of blog's I simply must throw the question out there. But before we get to the question (those of us too impatient to wait should perhaps check the title of this post) allow me to give you a bit of my personal background.
   I am a 33 year old married man with two kids and a loving (UNDERSTANDING *wife) wife. I am happy with my family with no real issues to talk about. I also own a PS3, PS4, Xbox one, WiiU, 3DS, PSVita, Wii and on the Wii i have the "Virtual console" with games from the Snes, NES, Megadrive, N64 and neo geo systems. And I play and enjoy every single one of them on a daily basis. I perhaps sink in around 15-20 hours of gaming per week and consider it a personal injustice if pesky things like real life get in the way of an expected gaming session.
   My question is this: Am I getting too old to be into gaming as much as I am? Be aware I always make time for my kids and wife,they absolutely do come first. Its just that gaming is a very close second.
   In this day and age of connected communities via Facebook or Twitter etc things are not like they used to be. This isnt our parents era of no T.V or social media. No video game consoles or things to do inside your house other than house duties or-ahem- extra curricula activities (Yes Jamie, that is where babies come from *ed). No back in our parents time if we wished to do anything enjoyable it meant going to that most dangerous of places: Outside.
   Bringing you back to the present we now of course have T.V and soaps and games and Facebook and Netflix and Ebay and a whole host of things to ensure that the aforementioned and dreaded "outside" is kept as far away from our thoughts as possible,
   I exaggerate and I love nothing more than a good restaurant or place to take the family, yet always at the forefront of my mind is that next scene in Metal Gear Solid 4 I must get to. Or a new strategy to ensure I finally become a level 32 hunter in Destiny. Even thinking of trying out new games that perhaps a guy of my age shouldnt be interested in like the latest Pokemon or Inazuma Eleven game. Yes gaming is in my very blood and ten-fifteen years ago I would know that maybe it is time to stop being a "big kid" and "grow up" and all that nonsense. I would be able to hear Danny Glovers imortal quote:"I'm getting too old for this shit" resonate through my grey matter and i would more than likely agree with my conscience and hang up the gaming gloves, though quite why my conscience would be an angry black American cop is beyond me....
   Anyway gaming has evolved in technology and perception and is much more accepted nowadays. I know that I don't intend to give up my hobby without a fight. But should I fight so hard to keep the dream alive? Or is it truly time I "grow up" and listen to my Danny Glover flavoured conscience?

Food for thought...

Introductions are futile


Ever heard the phrase "Be careful what you wish for"?
Or how about "Its good to talk"?
"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get"?
All the above could describe your past/future/lifestyle and indeed all the above have something in common: They are quotes.
  Quotes are a powerful thing and we use popular quotes in everyday life more than you probably think. Why? Because quotes enable us to connect and sympathise and recollect and generally make us realise that we may not be alone in this big game of life after all.
  What's my point with all this you may ask? Of course it would be wise and prudent to ask such a thing of me. Well my point dear reader is to activate that other common but widely unknown mechanic that popular culture uses on us on a regular basis: The hook.
   Yes my point is to interest you in my blog of inane ramblings ( some serious but most comical I assure you) and subconsciously get you to prod that like button. My aim in this blog is to comment and discuss, To rant and to analyse anything and everything, Mostly regarding things that interest me like film's, video games and pop culture because if I'm the one writing all this it should be something that I enjoy writing about. Here's hoping you will too.
   So of course an introduction regarding quotes wouldn't be much of an introduction without one. But which one best sum's up this page and entices you to keep on reading my blog? Ah, got it...ahem: "BE AFRAID. BE VERY AFRAID"




oh and I am 33, married, enjoy long walks on thE beach and pink sunsets etc etc.